Through the Gutter

Well, it’s certainly been quite a while since my last post, owing to a lack of inspiration. However, I happened upon some rather interesting (I use that word loosely) news not too long ago, and it’s a bit of a doozy for those in the know on this topic.

So as many of you know, Metallica released their first concert/bizarre oddity of a film titled Through the Never, and aside from the soundtrack’s sales, it didn’t do too well. Ever the opportunist(s), Metallica-or at least their officially self-proclaimed spokesperson, drummer Lars Ulrich-have decided to boost profits to (probably) make up for this loss with yet another brilliant and zany cogitation worthy only of those who dare in the world of art….

….and that is by teaming up with U2 and Green Day. Let that sink in, fellow metalheads. For those who don’t know, Metallica was once one of the heaviest and biggest thrash metal bands of the 1980s, and in those days, the world. Things changed with the death of their bassist and songwriter Cliff Burton, and I firmly stand with those who say that things changed for the worst. If the most recent developments in the band’s history haven’t made that clear, then I don’t know what will. Oh, and need I mention that this decision was made over drinks? I know that many good things have come out of a night of boozing (i.e., Hail of Bullets), but this should be added to the already-enormous list of things for which to wake up hungover and hating yourself. But hey, whatever puts bread on the table, right?

I don’t know what the expression “through the never” means or refers to, but it brings to my mind the gaping maw of the corporate black hole, devoid of even the faintest trace of light or even hope of escape. If that’s the case, then for all intents and purposes Metallica have crossed the event horizon and have passed through the never-to be crushed by the inescapable forces of greed and the need to make everyone happy. Everyone except the fanbase that got there where they are today.

So yeah, Metallica’s sank to a new low, but I’m honestly not that surprised anymore. For those who still think they’re still worth blowing a hundred or so bucks over, by all means do it. But Metallica is far past the point of earning any sort of respect from me, and I certainly will not entertain the thought of reliving adolescent memories by catching Green Day with them on tour (yes, Green Day was the first band I saw live, as with many thirteen year-olds). Before my inner music elitist grows further out of control,

Y’all take care now

Update: They have Christmas sweaters as official merch. Christmas sweaters.
http://www.toplessrobot.com/2013/10/yes_virginia_there_are_official_metallica_christma.php

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About optimistthepessimist

Always in transit.
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